FDA Ramps up Crackdown on Fake “Zombie Cures”

By Bulletin Staff

The US Food and Drug Administration this week stepped up its campaign against purveyors of what the agency says are fake and ineffective treatments for zombies, announcing action against a half-dozen companies that the agency says have been promoting and selling products that purportedly slow or reverse zombification.

The agency’s operation to shut down the companies was part of Operation Panzombea IX, the ninth annual International Week of Action against Fake Zombie Medicines (IWAFZM), a joint effort between Interpol and various national governments to combat the sale and distribution of fake zombification treatments (FZTs).

In its statement, the US agency announced that its Office of Undead Investigations (OUI) had worked with federal and local law enforcement agencies to shut down six different companies, seizing FZTs with an estimated street value of $27 million.

“In our unrelenting pursuit of public safety, we have dismantled the operations of bad actors who would exploit Americans’ justified fears in the face of the zombie threat. The FDA remains steadfast in its commitment to rooting out those who peddle false hopes in the darkest of times,” the agency said in its statement about its latest action.

The companies named in the FDA statement included:

• ResurZom Labs – Claimed its ZomRescue Elixir could temporarily reverse zombification symptoms, allowing individuals to regain their human faculties for a limited time.
• Re-Alive Innovations – Marketed its Z-VivaMax as a daily supplement that promised to slow the progression of the zombie virus and allow a victim to maintain cognitive function, despite a total lack of scientific evidence supporting the claim.
• LifeAfterNow Therapeutics – Touted its ZombiVital as an intravenous infusion that could restore vitality to the infected, though in reality it was nothing more than saline solution.
• ZombiXcelerate Pharmaceuticals – Advertised its Z-Xcelerate as a serum that could accelerate the natural healing process and purportedly counteract the zombie virus, though it had no proven effects.
• ReanimatoRx Solutions – Promoted its Reanimato-V as a “cutting-edge formula” that could reanimate the deceased back to human life, preying on the desperation of those closest to victims of the virus.
• MortalSafeguard Inc. – Marketed its ZombiQuell Ultra treatment as a high-potency formula that could completely halt the progression of the virus, prevent individuals from turning into zombies and even reverse the early stages of infection.

The companies marketed and sold their products through websites like cureforzombies.com and backfromtheundead.com. The FDA noted that while it works with internet service providers to shut down such sites as they are identified, the companies are able to quickly stand up new sites in order to continue selling their products. Many such products are also sold through the so-called “Dark Web,” the agency said.

Roscoe Zippinger, director of the OUI, said in the FDA’s statement that his office would continue to fight against fraudsters looking to exploit the public’s fear of zombies and zombification. “While we may not be experts in zombie eradication, we are the undisputed champions of identifying pharmaceutical fraud and quackery. Rest assured, we’re leaving no stone unturned – or, in this case, no undead sham unexposed – to protect the health and safety of the American public,” Zippinger said.

The World Health Organization (WHO) has estimated that nearly 10.5% of the medications sold worldwide are subpar or fake, resulting in 1 million or more deaths globally every year and causing more than $20 billion in financial impacts.

For its part, the FDA runs a program called BeSafeRx: Know Your Online Pharmacy that provides consumers with information on how to safely buy medicines online and how to identify illegal web-based pharmacies.

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