Category: Goverment Initiatives
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“Z Visa” Program Would Let Wealthy Buy US Entry for Their Undead Relatives
Wealthy Americans will soon be able to purchase the right for their zombified family members to enter the United States on a so-called “Z visa,” the Trump administration announced this week, breaking with longstanding policy against undead immigration.
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6 Weeks after “Liberation Day,” Tariffs Still Loom for “Zombia”
The Trump Administration is touting progress in securing trade deals in the wake of its on-again/off-again tariff war, but one country continues to be absent from the negotiating table. That country: “Zombia.”
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Reviving Debunked Claims, DOGE Says Over 1 Million Undead Getting Social Security
Representatives of the Department of Government Efficiency are alleging that the government is paying out billions of dollars annually in Social Security payments to the undead, bringing long-debunked claims of “zombie freeloaders” back from the grave.
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Trump’s Evisceration of Zombie Research “Puts Americans at Risk,” Experts Warn
The Trump administration has made sweeping cuts to funding for zombie science research, defunding dozens of studies and projects aimed at mitigating the undead threat, in a move that experts say heightens the danger that the living dead pose to living Americans.
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Government Scrambles to Rehire Zombie Response Experts in DOGE Typo Fiasco
The Trump administration is scrambling to rehire zombie response experts it dismissed last week amid concerns that their firing could result in unchecked outbreaks of the undead, according to government sources.
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Congress Eyes Ramping up Superdead Program Budget to Accelerate Toxic Zombie Waste Cleanup
Congress is weighing increasing the budget for the cleanup of toxic zombie waste sites, a part of the Superfund program aimed at mitigating the legacy and impacts of locations where undead waste was improperly disposed of or stored
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Highways of the Dead: Government Targets Zombie-Vehicle Collisions
Federal and state governments are taking steps to reduce the impacts of collisions between zombies and motor vehicles, according to a new report from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration
Bulletin of the Zombie Scientists 